“You will lose someone you can’t live without,and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.” -Anne Lamott

((If you are suffering and need help, but don't know where to start, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255))

Sunday, November 13, 2011

10/26/2011

Dear Danny,
I truly hope you are not in anymore pain. I can't even begin to imagine what you've been feeling throughout the past 8 years, but you were definitely good at hiding it. I wish you hadn't hidden it from us. I wish you would have told us how you felt. We wanted so badly to understand how you felt. But we couldn't understand with you being so quiet and keeping to yourself.
I love you so much. You have always been such an amazing brother and one of my best friends. I will always remember our quirky games we played together. Especially when you would pull me around by my pants until they would fall off, then you would hurry and turn away so I could put them back on, and then we'd do that all over again! I won't forget "Barbroes", wrestling, pogs, cars, hiding from mom in the coat closet! Man, we sure made her mad a lot. But it was all worth it, spending time with you.
I hope you knew how much I loved you, and I never judged you for any of your choices. You did whatever made you happy. I wish so badly that there was something I could have done to save you. I know that in the end it was your decision to take your own precious life, but I feel like I could have hugged you more, kissed you more, and told you how much I loved you more. I always knew you loved me. I never had the slightest bit of doubt in my mind. I felt like we had such a unique closeness and awesome relationship. I always knew that I could talk to you about anything that was on my mind, and I did just that, loving every second of it. I just wish you could have told me how you were feeling, instead of hiding it all in...
Love Always,
Talysa

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