Dear Danny,
6 months ago today was the start of the most unbelievable nightmare. A nightmare I still hope and pray to wake up from. Here, 6 months seems like an Eternity, but that is nothing compared to how long it feels like til the next time I will be able to see you again.
6 months. 26 weeks.182 days. 4368 hours.
That is how long it has been since you left us here in complete darkness.
It still hurts. Everyday. And I only feel myself getting weaker. I cry a lot lately, and sometimes I'm even taken back from it. I don't feel it coming half the time. I feel overly sensitive with somethings. Me and Kellen fell asleep to Mr. Deeds last night and there was a funeral scene. I forced myself to close my eyes during that part. I don't know why things like that are getting to me so easily! It's frustrating, really. I want this to be over. I can't be strong forever, but I have to try. Even if it takes all that I have.
I've been listening to a song by Miranda Lambert a lot lately. It doesn't help the hurt, but at the same time, it brings me comfort because of how much I can relate to it. Of course, I change a few words, but for the most part, it is perfect for how I and many, many others feel.
Here are the lyrics:
Over You
Weather man said it's gonna snow
By now I should be used to the cold
Mid-February shouldn't be so scary
It was only December
I still remember the presents, the tree, you and me
But you went away
How dare you?
I miss you.
They say I'll be OK
But I'm not going to ever get over you
Living alone here in this place
I think of you, and I'm not afraid
Your favorite records make me feel better
Cause you sing along
With every song
I know you didn't mean to give them to me
But you went away
How dare you?
I miss you
They say I'll be OK
But I'm not going to ever get over you
It really sinks in, you know, when I see it in stone.
Cause you went away,
How dare you?
I miss you
They say I'll be OK
But I'm not going to ever get over you.
Having you gone feels like a nail is being hammered in my heart. I truly believe you didn't mean to leave us and put us through this Hell, but it doesn't matter. The pain is still unbearable. I really hope you are doing all that you can to get to where you need to be so we can spend Eternity together. Please continue to visit me in my dreams. I love hearing your voice more than anything and I NEED to continue to hear it. It is very comforting.
I love you Danny. More and more everyday. I can't imagine what our reunion will be like!! I am looking so forward to it, and it can't come soon enough. I miss you like crazy.
Love Always,
Talysa
